From Woke to Polyamory: This is Where The US is Heading
Amy and Dave are married and have two children. They also have a girlfriend, Lisa, who lives with them. They consider themselves a “triad” - welcome to New America
A CBS News article from 2019 features interviews with people who practice polyamory or other forms of non-monogamy, and tells how they navigate their complex relationships.
This is how America is moving forward with new thinking in addition to the woke culture.
Love in Multiples: : How Polyamorous People Manage Their Relationships
For some people, having one romantic partner is enough. But for others, one is not enough. They want to have multiple partners, with the consent and knowledge of everyone involved.
This is called polyamory, or ethical non-monogamy, and it is a growing trend in the U.S.According to a 2019 survey by YouGov, 22% of U.S. adults have had a consensual non-monogamous relationship at some point in their lives, and 4% are currently in one.
Polyamory is not a sexual orientation, but rather a personal choice or preference. Some people may identify as polyamorous because they feel that they have the capacity to love more than one person at a time, or because they value honesty, diversity and freedom in their relationships.But how do polyamorous people manage their complex relationships?
How do they deal with jealousy, stigma, discrimination and conflict? How do they balance their time, energy and resources among their partners? And how do they find compatible partners who share their values and expectations?CBS News spoke to several people who practice polyamory or other forms of non-monogamy, and learned about their experiences and challenges.
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Meet the Polyamorous People
Amy and Dave are married and have two children. They also have a girlfriend, Lisa, who lives with them. They consider themselves a “triad”, meaning that they are all romantically and sexually involved with each other.
They have been together for three years, and say that they are very happy and fulfilled.Brian and Kelly are married and have a “don’t ask, don’t tell” policy. They both date other people outside of their marriage, but they don’t share any details with each other.
They say that this arrangement works for them, because they trust each other and respect each other’s privacy.Chris and Jen are dating and live together. They also have other partners who they see occasionally. They call themselves “solo poly”, meaning that they value their autonomy and independence, and don’t want to merge their lives with any of their partners.
They say that this arrangement gives them variety and flexibility.Dan and Liz are married and have an “open relationship”. They both date other people outside of their marriage, but they tell each other everything. They say that this arrangement enhances their communication and intimacy, and that they enjoy hearing about each other’s adventures.
The Benefits and Struggles of Polyamory?
The polyamorous people we interviewed said that there are many benefits to their relationships, such as:Increased intimacy: Having multiple partners can increase the level of intimacy and connection with each partner, as well as with oneself.
Polyamorous people can learn from different perspectives and experiences, and discover new aspects of themselves.Increased support: Having multiple partners can provide more emotional, practical and financial support than having one partner.
Polyamorous people can rely on a network of people who care for them and help them in times of need.Increased variety: Having multiple partners can provide more variety and excitement than having one partner.
Polyamorous people can explore different interests, hobbies and sexual preferences with different partners, and avoid boredom and monotony.Increased happiness: Having multiple partners can increase the level of happiness and satisfaction with one’s life. Polyamorous people can fulfill their needs and desires with different partners, and feel more authentic and free.
"Things are opening up": Non-monogamy is more common than you'd think
"What's unusual today is that in open relationships, people are transparent," one expert said.
Challenges
However, the polyamorous people interviewed also said that there are many challenges to their relationships, such as: Jealousy: Having multiple partners can trigger feelings of jealousy, insecurity and fear of losing one’s partner or being replaced by someone else.
Polyamorous people have to deal with these feelings by communicating openly, reassuring each other, setting boundaries and practicing self-care. Stigma: Having multiple partners can expose one to social stigma, prejudice and discrimination from family, friends, co-workers and society at large. Polyamorous people have to deal with these challenges by educating others, finding supportive communities, advocating for their rights and being proud of their choices.
Limitations
Having multiple partners can limit one’s access to legal rights and protections that are granted to monogamous couples, such as marriage benefits, health insurance coverage, parental rights and inheritance rights. Polyamorous people have to deal with these issues by seeking legal advice, creating alternative agreements and joining advocacy groups. Conflict: Having multiple partners can increase the potential for conflict among the partners or between the partners and their families or friends. Polyamorous people have to deal with these conflicts by negotiating expectations, resolving disputes, compromising solutions and respecting differences.
Conclusion
Polyamory is a form of non-monogamy that involves having multiple romantic relationships at the same time, with the consent and knowledge of everyone involved. It is a growing trend in the U.S., but it also faces many challenges and misconceptions. Polyamorous people have to manage their complex relationships with openness, consent, trust, communication skills, clear boundaries and mutual respect. They also have to find compatible partners who share their values and expectations.20:54
Polyamory is not for everyone, but for some people, it is a way of living and loving that brings them happiness and fulfillment.